There is a particular kind of disease that comes by surprise. It doesn’t announce itself. It doesn’t show up in dramatic episodes. It shows up in a student who learns and understands but does nothing. It looks like potential, one that quietly kills itself.

The fear of failure has become one of the most underdiagnosed diseases among the education system, not because it is something foreign, but because it has evolved into a norm. It hides behind seemingly confident perfectionists who rely on outside motivation to make something of themselves.

I sat down with Wise Academy’s Dean of Students, Dr. Anwar Beydoun, who has watched this very disease play out for over a decade. Here, he recognized it as a pattern rather than something new.

“There have been so many people in the last 10 years where, when you’re working with them, you can tell that they’re comprehending what you’re saying,” said Dr. Beydoun. “They understand the objective and can feel that they can do it, but unless myself or someone else is consistently putting the thumb over their head, telling them “Hey, you can do it” and be a continuous reinforcement, they end up struggling to see that thing through or even start it.”

At its root is the fear of failure reveals itself to be a problem of dependency rather than one of procrastination. Students can only move forward at the hands of a ‘borrowed’ feeling of self-confidence. Identifying such a dynamic, Dr Beydoun claims, “They need to feel 100% confident at all times, when in reality they don’t need anyone. They can do it, but their fear is that if there isn’t anyone watching or if there isn’t any external motivation, they ultimately think they’re going to fail.”

This creates an form of situational irony as when one takes outward praise as a form of dopamine, it contributes to their own downfall rather than providing the benefit they would normally expect. Ultimately deepening the cycle and letting it feed on itself.

What makes this disease particularly complex and difficult to address is the assumption of productivity. Today’s students become hyperfixated on taking on more and more responsibilities: academics, extracurriculars, familial responsibilities, social life, etc. However, the tendency to suppress passion and focus on ‘practicality’ rather than finding who they are becomes evident to their own self-destruction. The assumption is that by taking on such a load, they are setting themselves up for success, a claim that Dr. Beydoun pushes back on. “It’s sort of life a reverse narcissistic type of approach... They think that they are [creating a more confident version of themselves] by taking care of everything that I’ve mentioned, but they’re not getting to the heart of who they are first. If they don’t have that, they struggle immensely when they go to a university and make a life for themselves.”

In other words, achievement is not dependent on filling up a resumé with ‘practical’ accomplishments. It doesn’t build the confidence of a person and teach them how to overcome failure and push forward alone. They need to find themselves and understand that the key to overcoming such a fear is building your own reassurance through measures that really do set you up for success. For Dr. Beydoun, this stands to be work ethic as, to him, it is “more important than any dual enrollment class because it will outweigh whatever potential fear they would deal with down the road when they go into these bigger institutions. If you don’t have the work ethic, the fear will still come in. If it comes in, you are done and it will be extremely difficult for you to come back.”

“Failure does not exist if you don’t want it to exist. Failure only exists if you need a reason to doubt yourself,” said Dr. Beydoun. “That is as truthful and direct as I can be from my personal experience, my experience in working with students, and from my experience from when I used to be a psychologist from some students. You can use that fear as a tool to push you to something as a challenge, but if it’s not going to be a challenge, don’t use that at all because it will ultimately break you.”

Although fear of failure stands to be detrimental, it can also stand to be a heavily informative form of motivation. It isn’t solved by constant praise or glamorous confidence borrowed by other’s temporary opinions; it’s solved by the ugly and grueling reality of learning to trust yourself even when nobody is watching.