Growing up as a young girl is a misunderstood difficulty that only those who lived it can understand, particularly from the ages of nine to twelve, or the “preteen” era. This liminal and confusing phase has all but disappeared amongst younger generations. What was once a time for watching “Teen-Nick” and playing with Monster High dolls has become scrolling TikTok and going to Sephora. Playing with Barbie make-up has become multiple step skincare routines. What was a time for developing and figuring out your individuality has been taken over by the pressure to fit in and act older. Preteens have always been attracted to things that seem older, but with how accessible the internet has gotten, it has become much easier for young “Gen Alpha” girls to see and be pressured to dress like teenagers and young adults. They feel they have to have the Lululemon leggings, the Drunk Elephant skin care, and the newest viral cosmetic product. But what has led to this sudden jump from fashion dolls to full faces of make-up.

The biggest culprit for the disappearance of the tween girl demographic is social media. Technology has made accessing the internet way easier than it has been in previous generations. And despite most social media apps like Tik Tok and Instagram requiring users to be thirteen years old or older, this hasn’t prevented eleven-year-olds and even younger from creating accounts. “Insider Intelligence” reports kids ages eleven and younger make up 2.5 percent of TikTok users. Tween girls feel pressure to fit in and not be thought of as children. So if all they see online are TikTok videos and Instagram posts from older influencers, showing off their clothes, make-up collections, skincare routines, it’s natural for them to want to be like those influencers and want the filtered, edited lifestyle they present. Especially if they then go to school and see their friends and classmates dressing and acting like influencers.

In her article, “Modern culture has ripped away girls’ childhood, taking their joy with it,” published in “The Guardian,” Elle Hunt writes, “Now every young person with a phone is able to have a secretive and unceasing online life, while the bars for self-comparison – in terms of beauty standards, or body image – have come untethered from reality.” She adds, “With so much of their private lives put selectively on show, the evergreen sense of adolescence as a competition – to be the most popular, or prettiest, or thinnest – has been put on steroids.” Tween girls feel as though they need the clothes and the skincare because social media is telling them they aren’t good enough and these things will make them cool. This had led many girls to rush through childhood and dive straight into being teenagers.

You may be wondering, why has Gen Alpha suddenly turned to social media? Why aren’t they socializing the way other generations before them have? One of the biggest explanations is the lack of third places for pre-teens. A third place, as coined by Ray Oldenberg, are “public places on neutral ground where people can gather and interact. In contrast to first places (home) and second places (work), third places allow people to put aside their concerns and simply enjoy the company and conversation around them.”

Since the pandemic we have seen a massive decline in such places, but especially for pre-teens. In the 1990’s and 2000’s the most common third places for tween girls were malls, and stores that were specifically marketed to them like Claire’s, Justice, and Limited Too. These super feminine and girly shops perfectly filled the pre-teen desire of acting and dressing older while selling mostly age appropriate clothes, accessories, and toys. Gen Z and Millennial girls fondly remember going to Justice with their friends and buying friendship necklaces, and getting their ears pierced at Claire’s. But the popularity of these stores have declined, mostly because the malls they live in have been failing. “Shopping malls struggle to maintain foot traffic as they compete against e-commerce giants like Amazon, and many have fallen by the wayside,” Jamie Johnson writes in her article “Why Shopping Centers May Soon Be Obsolete” for Business.com.

Krian Subramanian says in his article, “ON THE FRONT LINES: Death of tween culture,” published in The Daily Targum, “It also does not help that many of these spaces are actively hostile toward a tween presence.” While Limited Too, and Justice still are around, with the former exclusively existing online and the latter being online and in some Walmart stores, and Claire’s are still kicking around in some malls, their attempts to appeal to Gen Alpha really haven’t had an impact. They simply no longer have much appeal for younger generations, and they are no longer third places. So with no third places to hang out with friends, it only makes sense why Gen Alpha have turned to social media for socialization. Because outside of school there really are no places for them.

For most girls, the ages of nine to twelve are a confusing and sometimes scary time. A time where you can’t stand being a child anymore but you’re not old enough to be treated like a teenager. Your body is changing and your friends are changing as well. You have questions you feel embarrassed to ask and you feel like you’re on your own. And for many girls going through this time they find immense comfort in the people and places that make them feel they’re not alone.

For Gen Z, going to the mall and shopping at the super glittery Justice store and going to the movies with your bracelets and fake make-up from Clarie’s made you feel like everything was going to be alright. You felt like you finally had your independence and found your individuality. It may sound strange but those moments of goofing around with your friends at the mall were some of the best and most cherished memories of the people who lived them. And it’s really sad to see those girls who are supposed to be holding dolls in a Claire’s, worrying about their hair clips matching their shirts, are now at Sephora, holding anti-aging skin care products, worrying about how good their makeup looks.